Cats are graceful

Cats are graceful and powerful.  Really.

Except when stooges put sheers in the windows.  I mean, what the hell???

I keep forgetting they're there, and then I try to jump up on the window ledge and hit the sheers and slide off in a heap on the floor.

All you can do then is to act like you meant to do that.  You know, I kind of nonchalantly inspect my tail or bat at a dust mote until I can tell if the stooges are laughing at me.  I take note of when the stooges laugh.  When they do, I find a black sweater and shed on it.

One day I was sitting by the window watching those stupid birds flitting around outside and thinking about how their little birdy skulls would crunch between my teeth and I sneezed and hit my face on the window and fell off the ledge.  When I got up, Stoogess was pointing and laughing.  So I got up on her lap and farted on her.  Hahaha.  Meoooow.

Cats are graceful.  Just not sometimes.